I’m writing this post May 23rd, about thirty minutes before it’s going live (I think), from my slapped-together glass IKEA desk in the converted 2nd bedroom of our apartment in Colorado Springs, Colorado.
We’re here, we’re safe, and we’re (somewhat) moved-in.
But first, the rant.
Everything I had planned for this blog and my work for early this week has been derailed.
First, our move-in date was supposed to be Sunday, May 21st, and we had movers ready to go then. However, there was a miscommunication and we were told that we’d need to wait until Monday. Our movers couldn’t do it on Monday.
So, I spent the day moving in our 100+ boxes, giant furniture, and living paraphernalia while my wife unpacked and organized. We’re a great team, but we’d have been an even better team with a few movers around to help.
Second, I had to miss a day of work (Monday), which meant that I had to play catch-up yesterday, rather than get this week’s posts scheduled and ready to go. Normally, I’m at least 1-2 weeks ahead of schedule with the blog, but with the packing and moving going on last week, those “extra posts” got all used up…
Third, I had a couple guest posts go live:
- What David Ogilvy Can Teach You About Marketing on Firepole Marketing
- How to Develop and Win a True Audience Through Social Media on KR Pooler’s site
Great, right? Wrong.
I was supposed to have four posts go live this week–no idea where the others are–all in preparation for the launch of my new book/manifesto, Building a Blog That Readers Love: 101 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Launch Your Empire:
Looks great, huh?
As you can imagine, having four guest posts, two posts on LiveHacked.com, and one on Lifehacks.org would have been wonderful for promoting the book.
As you can also imagine, not having any of this work out correctly is not wonderful for promoting the book.
Fourth, our sink exploded last night, and I flooded the entire kitchen and part of the living room. I didn’t even wait for the maintenance guy to show up–I poured myself a big glass of wine, grabbed Chris’ new book (The $100 Startup, an absolute must-read), and went to bed.
All-in-all, not a perfect start to our new life in Colorado.
But you know what?
It’s going to be okay. We’ll finish unpacking and moving in, and I’ll get back on track with these posts, and my book launch event will still be awesome.
I’ll continue to write, and to help people however I can (I’m sorry, to those of you who’ve emailed me this weekend–I will get back to you!), and create value wherever I can.
And that leads to the point of this post.
Maybe you’ve struggled with something like this in the past. Your plans, however perfectly and immaculately designed, somehow become an unraveled mess. You want to scream; press the pause button, and take a bubble bath.
Nothing you do can break you out of this funk.
…And that’s just it: stop trying to break out.
Stop trying to get that lost time back. Stop trying to “get ahead.”
Time is not something we can buy, save, and trade–we have what we have, and every second–whether used or forfeited–is going to continue ticking on. If we mess up and lose some of it, it’s like crying over spilled milk. There’s nothing we can do to get it back.
What to do instead
Instead of wasting more time pondering, wondering “what if,” and basically whining about all that you’ve lost, do this instead:
- Acknowledge. Know that you’ve lost time–you cannot get it back. It might sound harsh, but once you realize (once I realize!) that this time is gone forever, we (I) can start again and focus on the here and now.
- Accept. This goes both ways–first, accept that you’ve lost time and get over it. Also, though, know that we (your fans, readers, coworkers, etc.) accept that you’ve lost time. We get it–we’ve been there. Yeah, I want to post two or three times per week, but I’m not able to this week. Bummer–I’m sure my readers will get over it. They might need to be coerced to come back if it’s been too long, but either way they’ll come back.
- Ascertain. In some sales departments, a funny term is thrown around: “ascertain the pain.” It’s meant to remind salespeople of the goal: finding out what the pain points are in a prospect’s life, and understanding it. In this example, I’m talking about “ascertaining the situation.” Understand clearly what went wrong, what parts of it were your own fault (not for blame, but for growth), and then figure out what to do next. If you ascertain a specific bad situation well, you probably won’t be faced with that same situation again.
- Analyze. Take a pencil and a piece of paper and write down what you’re going to do next. Not a to-do list necessarily, but a “this is what needs to happen today/tomorrow/this week to get back on track” list. The difference is simple and crucial: don’t just rehash your “to do” items–figure out what is going to make you feel comfortable with your situation again. For me, that means I need to write 4,000 between now and tomorrow morning. I don’t really care where those words end up, or if they’re even published–I just want to know that I’m setting the standards again for my writing.
*Hmm, I realized those all started with “A.” Sorry for that–I’m not a card-carrying member of the Americans Against Acronym And Alliteration Abuse club, but I smirk a little when I see stuff like what I just wrote…
The point is: don’t just take the hit and brush it off–yeah, it happened. Yeah, you won’t get that time back. But you also don’t need to work overtime, a double shift, or until 4 in the morning to “get back to square one.” Just focus on moving forward in your mind. If that means you need to put in a few extra hours, go for it. But often that means we just need to focus on our priorities (for me: family, job, writing) and do those (and only those) until we’re “right” again.
I hope this makes sense.
I don’t want to sound condescending–I’m no expert when it comes to playing catch-up, recovering from lost time, etc. I’m just a guy with a computer who wants to get stuff done.
I want that stuff to be awesome, and I want it to help people. Sometimes, though, I get sidetracked, confused, or just derailed altogether. The secret, to me, isn’t to focus on staying on track, because I’ll inevitably be let down.
No, to me, the secret is to acknowledge that *stuff* happens, get over it quickly, and make everything I produce after it happens that much better than I’d ever expected.
How I’m making this week better
So, since I’m interested in making everything better this week, I’m going to do something a little different. I’ve already asked my email subscribers if they’d be interested in reading my new book (Building a Blog Readers Love) for free, if they’d write an honest review on Amazon when it’s officially released.
And I’ll ask you the same thing–without needing to subscribe to any lists–if you’d be interested in reading the book before the official release. If so, just leave a comment and I’ll personally follow up. It doesn’t need to be long or fancy; just a “wassup” will do!
I can use the “pick-me-up,” and I’d love to share what I’ve been writing about with those of you who’d care to hear. Again, just leave a comment, and I’ll personally follow up with a copy of the manuscript.
Thanks guys and gals!
Hey Nick, I’m sorry to hear about your sink – that really sucks. But don’t worry, all these things get sorted out pretty quickly, and then things just start humming along. 🙂
Anyway, thanks again for the guest post over at Firepole Marketing, and persevere with the rest – it gets better. 🙂
Thanks, Danny–things do (and did) get sorted out pretty quickly, but I’m still waiting for the “humming” to begin…
And thank YOU for having me again at Firepole–got a good thing going there, and I’m proud to be a part!
Nick
I’d definitely be interested in reading and reviewing your book! Sorry to hear about the sink. I know first-hand how big of a pain plumbing problems can be (read: busted hot water heater). Best of luck in Colorado!
Hey Taylor!
Thanks for the comment–I’ll shoot over the book to you by EOD. Thanks!
Nick
I would love to read your book before the release date.
I’ve been in the dumps about all sorts of past and present crap this week, then a friend of mine sent me the like to this post. I can say it has made me feel much better, I’m one of those who try and capture all the time lost, while driving myself nuts… Thank you, Mike
Hey Mike!
Sorry to hear you’ve been going through a tough time, as a man of God I do believe there’s a reason (however confusing) for everything, and that life really does seem like a roller coaster sometimes.
Anyway–shoot me your email address, and I’ll send over the book tonight!
Thanks,
Nick
Sorry, about not getting back to you on this sooner, my spam filter sucked it up and I just noticed you did reply to me. Thank you,
Mike
No problem, Mike. Sorry for the “sucky” spam filter. Hyuk
Sorry to hear of all your moving challenges,Nick. We’ve all had days or some circumstance that threatens to do us in so I can definitely relate. But I like your fighting spirit and how you come out of it all with a plan and action. I will be happy to review your book. Hope things settle down. On a happy note, my readers are really liking the straight-forward, practical tips in your guest post! Take care~
Hey Kathy!
Thanks for the comment–it’s good to hear that from you, and I’m glad you understand why I haven’t been my normally-responsive self these past few days…
Anyway, thank YOU for having me on the site–here’s to doing it again sometime soon!
Nick
Absolutely! My pleasure Nick and I look forward to staying connected and welcoming you back to “my kitchen table” 🙂 My readers responded positively to your practical, do-able tips!
Kathy
I’ve had my a similar experience with water flooding except I was in an apartment and it not only flooded my apartment but the guy who lived downstairs…oops!
Thanks for the tips, they really do help us move past the situation as we learn from them instead of struggling/fighting against them. Praying the rest of your week gets better.
Thanks, TC. Seems like we’ve all “been there, done that,” sometime in the past. Ha. Thanks for the prayers as well–and talk to you soon!
Nick
Nick – We’ve only just “met” via Twitter, but I already feel I know you well enough to send a virtual hug to help make up for your awful week. Having moved myself and my daughter 3 times in the past 5 years, I feel your pain. (We’re happily “planted” in a great new house where we plan to stay for a while now. Phew!)
Anyway – love the post and would love a free copy of the book (looks great!) in exchange for a review.
Hang in there – love the attitude and “reality check.” 🙂
Thanks for commenting, Jamie! I’ll send it over right away!
Nick
What a great post – and I’d love to have a look at your book and post a review on Amazon and on my review site, Just Heard, Just Read, Just Seen. Right now, I’m off to hit the share buttons. I repeat: great post.
Thanks, Angelique!
I appreciate your kind words–it’s great to hear from you! I’ve sent out the book; check your email–thanks!
Nick
Hi Nick,
I can relate to your story here because I have had my fair share of days like yours. When this happens to me I sort of reboot myself and start off the next day in a much better place.
Yeah, that’s been the culminating thought: stuff happens, we move on, and stuff happens again. Haha. Great advice, though–this weekend is a perfect time to “reboot” and start over!
Thanks for commenting, and talk to you soon!
Nick
Nick,
I can understand life getting in the way of goals. I started a new position in my day job two weeks ago, and I haven’t written a word since, either on my website or my WIP. My daily word count goal on Scrivener has jumped from around 340 per day to finish on schedule, up to almost 370 per day just by missing those two weeks. You’re absolutely right, though – time lost is time lost; what matters most is what we do with the coming minutes, not the ones that already slipped through our fingers due to circumstance. So for me – back to the writing schedule. I may finish late, but I will finish.
I thought I was already subscribed to your newsletter, but I wasn’t – I’ll sign up for it now. I’d be happy to review your book!
Keep up the good work,
MP
Hey MP!
Glad to hear you’re getting some use out of Scrivener, even if it’s the evil-word-count-motivation-monster!
You WILL finish, and it WILL be awesome! (And make sure to let me know when you do, so I can go buy it!)
Thanks for subscribing, and we’ll talk soon–also, sending the book over now!
Nick
Hey, that “evil word count motivation monster” may be a pain, but it’s always lurking in the back of my mind, telling me “You’re falling behind! Write something!” Thanks to Scrivener for putting an annoying voice in my head!
I got your book, and I’ll read it this week while I’m on vacation – perfect timing!
MP
I would love to read your book! Your blog today came at a critical time for a dear friend of ours. He’s not a writer, he’s a designer–of tee shirts and caps! But lost time was the topic of our discussion last night, and I hope he’ll read your blog. It’s encouraging and insightful, real. Thanks again.
Awesome, thanks Lonnie! Send me your email address and I’ll shoot it your way!
Hello there! I know this is kinda off topic but I was wondering which blog platform are you using for this site? I’m getting fed up of WordPress because I’ve had problems with hackers and I’m looking at alternatives for another platform. I would be awesome if you could point me in the direction of a good platform.